Water works

Thank goodness the weight that was showing in the scale at night wasn't real weight gain!  I spent yesterday consuming more water than I've ever drank in a single day (about 10 glasses), and this morning, the weight was gone. Shew!

It's a good lesson to learn how important adequate water intake is. 

Today has been a rough day. I've felt very tired today and when I got home, I was so hungry, I went on a small binge (5 Chip Ahoy cookies and a croissant). I'm pretty sure the hunger was directly linked to my insane tiredness, but I couldn't nap because I was home alone with our 13 month old. 

It's now his bedtime, and I'm hitting the sack before I go on another binge!

Binge Control

Today my soul focus was on not binging at work. One of my binge triggers is chocolate, and there's a 10 POUND, yes, POUND bar in the kitchen at work. One of our consultants is from Hershey, PA and brought it with her when she was here last week for the holiday party. 

I did well in the morning. I had an egg mcmuffin and I think the protein helped me from having an oatmeal carb crash (my normal breakfast). 

When I started to get hungry around 10:30, I allowed myself one serving of tortilla chips and salsa, which was left over from yesterday's lunch. The salsa was so spicy hot, it staved off a binge episode. 

Around 12:30, I decided to try the Fresh market near my work and chose brown rice sushi and a small container of cucumber salad. This grocery was a good find as it will always have healthy options for when I don't bring my lunch to work. 

After the sushi (which was pretty flavorless, I should have went with the white rice), I wasn't satisfied. I was full, but not taste bud satisfied and the chocolate called to me. 

I got a glass of water (my 6th glass by this time), and tried to postpone the binge I could feel coming on. After the water, I still wanted the chocolate. I decided to pump (I'm still nursing my son) and listen to my Quit Binge Eating podcast. This postponed it for a little while, but I finally gave in to one piece of chocolate. 

As I was eating the one piece, I realized I was craving another...while I was still chewing the first piece!  I found myself grabbing another piece and I looked around the kitchen for a solution. I ate a tortilla chip to get the sweet taste out of my mouth, hoping that would help. Nope. Then I looked at the coffee pot. I decided to stick the piece of chocolate that was in my hand in a coffee cup, and poor coffee over top. This have me a little of the chocolate taste, and the time it took to drink the coffee was enough time to avoid a major binge. So, while I didn't have the control to not eat two pieces of chocolate, I did come up with a Now solution that made me stop the binge. 

Im happy I didn't binge. I'm going to try this technique next time and see if it works again!

M.I.A.

The past two days have not been good days. I've binged both days, and my weight is up. :(

I need to do something to get my eating under control. I'm thinking about starting Weight Watchers. I looked at their website and found a site close to me. I just need to go now. 

On Saturday, I did very little activity. After the girl child's soccer game, we went to a deli close by. I got a Tuna Sandwich, but it was huge and on ciabatta bread (probably one of the higher calorie breads). Then we went to WalMart to get a few items. That was it. 

Sunday, I did get up and run. I ran two miles with an average pace of 11:57/mi, which is an improvement over my previous paces. It seems that the interval training is really working. 

I'm going to try and have a later breakfast, and workout later in the afternoon to see if that helps my eating. Fingers crossed!

Not So Rest Day

I woke up this morning motivated to clean. That lasted all of ONE hour. 

After doing a load of dishes, washing a load of laundry, and folding (and putting away!) two loads of laundry, my motivation soon faded. So, I made myself a cup of tea and sat down to watch the morning shows. At the first commercial break, I decided to do a little more cleaning, instead of watching the commercials. I promised myself I'd do this for the rest of the day...whenever a commercial came on, I'd get up and do a little more cleaning. 

I also came up with a plan for when I felt a binge come on. I decided to take the baby for a walk. Well, that was the plan. I didn't really feel binge-y though...well, not until I picked the girl child up from school. Her school is next to a McDonald's and I found myself pulling out of her school and straight into the McDonald's, where I order both of us an ice cream cone. It was a completely mindless act. I didn't even think twice about it until I was finished eating it. I counted the calories, but I hate that I was out of control. And the worst part was that I didn't realize I was out of control until it was too late. :(

It means that I'll have very little calories for dinner, and none for my night time wine. Booo. 

I was doing so well eating for awhile, and I'm trying to figure out what happened to stop my healthy eating. The only thing I can think of is that I added sugar substitutes back into my diet. I've been having Splenda in my oatmeal and coffee, and Coke Zeros when I'm out and about. I think I need to cut sugar (and substitutes) out again. 

Fever

I didn't get very much sleep last night. Before bedtime we noticed that the baby was very hot. I took his temperature and it was 100.9. Fevers scare me since my brother had a high one when we were kids and it triggered a seizure. He became epileptic and had seizures until he grew out of them as an adult. That experience has made me very fearful of seizures, so I gave the baby Tylenol and then monitored his fever about ever hour throughout the night.  At one point it went down to 100.3, but by morning it was 101. I gave him another dose of Tylenol and decided to take him to the doctor's when they opened. 

In the meantime, we took the girl child to school and then went back home to wait until the doctor's opened at 9. Around 8:30, the baby fell asleep and he felt a lot cooler. I decided to wait until he woke up and reassess then. He slept for 2 hours!  When he woke up, I took his temperature and it was down to 99 degrees. I decided not to take him to the doctor since he had no other symptoms and just chalked the fever up to teething. 

Since the baby hasn't been feeling well, I decided not to take him out, so I didn't go to the gym or grocery store. We stayed home all day, and I found myself eating out of boredom. And since the cupboards were basically bare, I found myself eating items that didn't satisfy the cravings I had. So I'd eat something else...and then something else...and again...and again. Until I had eaten almost a full other day's worth of calories!  It was a pretty bad binge. I was supposed to weigh in today, but I'm scared to step in the scale!

I've got to make a plan to stay out of the house tomorrow and get back on track. :-(  I'm going to go straight to the gym after dropping the girl off at school and run on the treadmill. I need to lift weights too, since I missed today's workout. I'm going to take my clothes with me and shower there, so that I don't have to go home to shower and change. I hope that will keep me out of the refrigerator. 

After the gym I'm going to grocery shop. Or maybe go the the library first. If I grocery shop first, I have to come home to out away groceries and I will probably just sit down in front of the TV. :(

Then I'll pick up the girl from school. I want to go for a run with her, since we didn't run on Tuesday. And I want to take her outside to play. I need to stay busy. I need to stay out of the fridge and pantry. 

Wino

To drink or not to drink, that shouldn't have been the question. 

After a long day if taking care of the kids, house, and husband by myself, I decided to unwind with a glass of wine while I cooked dinner. That was a bad decision. I normally have a glass after I've put the kids to bed, and can enjoy it. Well, one glass led to two, and two led to me being drunk!  I'm such a lightweight. 

I ended up eating dinner drunk, which meant that after I was finished with one serving of everything...I went straight back and filled my plate up again. :-(

I counted all of the calories, and I'm 400 calories over...again. I have got to get this under control. I don't know if it's because I'm doing everything myself, or what, but I've just felt ravenous the past 2 days. I've made horrible food decisions. For instance...right now I'm thinking "What they hell, you've already busted calories, why not have some more Snackwell cookies too??!!"  I've got to stop buying them. I can't trust myself with them. :-/

Binge Triggers

It's been a rough day. I was up more than usual with the baby last night, then my daughter had the early soccer game. I've felt sluggish all day. I even took a 2 hour nap and woke up still having problems focusing. Then I started getting a sinus headache and it all made sense. Today was a high pollen day.

I'm a severe allergy sufferer. It's one of my binge triggers.  When I'm suffering from allergies, I usually get a headache and feel nauseous. I eat because it relieves the nausea...but only temporarily, while I'm physically eating. So as soon as I've eaten one thing, I feel nauseous again, and I have to eat again...immediately. I continue eating until I'm miserably full and have to go sleep it off. Sometimes I'll actually eat consciously to go to sleep. 

I've been aware of my allergies as a trigger for about 2 years now. I hate taking medication, so I often wait until it's too late. Today, I recognized it and took a Sudafed. The problem is it takes awhile for the Sudafed to kick in...and it can dry up my milk, so I try not to take it too often.  While I wait for the medicine to kick in, I decided to try something I learned on Runs For Cookies (http://www.runsforcookies.com/?m=1) blog. She feeds the binge...one craving and one serving at a time. So I measured out one serving and ate it, once I was finished, I put the timer on to wait 10 minutes and reevaluate if I'm still hungry. I was still hungry, so I laid down for another nap/rest. 

My allergies affect my weight a lot, both by what I eat, and my activity level. When my allergies are acting up, I don't feel like going outside, being active, or doing anything for that matter. I just want to sleep.  

We went to a new restaurant tonight that was on a small lake. It's an old resort restaurant. The resort is long gone, but the restaurant remains. They serve Polish cuisine. If you know anything about Polish food, then you know it's heavy, stick to your ribs kind of food. I settled on a broiled fish platter because I only had 300 calories left for the day. 😞  It was flavorless. The rice was gross, so I decided to skip it and only ate a little of the coleslaw. Even doing that, I still went over my allowed calories. 

 

Need.More.Sleep

I found another binge trigger...tiredness. The baby woke up at 11:30pm, 2:30am, and then 4:00am to nurse.  He took awhile to get back to sleep after the last feeding, so I was wide awake by the time he fell asleep. I've been up every since. Exhausted. 

I was doing so well with my calories and choices until the severe fatigue set in. Now my body wants to sleep or eat...or both!  I'm waiting on the Hubs to get home so I can take a nap. If I don't, I will probably eat everything in the house. I'm going to try everything in my power to not eat anything else until I nap. I think I'll have a glass of hot tea while I wait. 

>>FF 3 hours>>

I ended up getting an hour of sleep and woke up just as hungry. I ended up over eating, again. :-/  I really need to add cardio back to my daily routine. 

Here's today's damage (I'll spare you the details today).